Illustration for article titled Trump Legally Moves To Florida. New York Changes the Locks.
SplinterRIP/MBCockMilton has a byline now.

Milty here.

One of the great things about NYC is our overwhelming contempt for Prez. Little Donny Smallhands, even before he was running for office. He got a vote total in low teens in the five boroughs, only winning Staten Island (which tells you all you need to know about Staten Island). It’s got to chap his ass knowing that the city he most desires to love and respect him, fucking hates him worse than he hates Muslims. He’s the needy jilted boyfriend wearing desperation as a cologne.

Well, fortunately for us, the the jilted boyfriend is trying to move on with his life, according to the NYTs:

In late September, Mr. Trump changed his primary residence from Manhattan to Palm Beach, Fla., according to documents filed with the Palm Beach County Circuit Court. Melania Trump, the first lady, also changed her residence to Palm Beach in an identical document.

Each of the Trumps filed a “declaration of domicile” saying that the Mar-a-Lago Club, Mr. Trump’s resort in Palm Beach, will be their permanent residence.

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No. Stop. Please come back.

Seriously though, this happened.

Some New York leaders shared the sentiment. “Good riddance,” Gov. Andrew M. Cuomo tweeted. “It’s not like Mr. Trump paid taxes here anyway. He’s all yours, Florida.”

Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out. Like the Governor said, “He’s all yours Florida.”

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